A wizard with a wand

I recently bought a wand-style vibrator, that plugs into an electric socket in stead of running on batteries. It's called Doxy Die Cast. I have a few different attatchments to it as well, but the wand itself is plenty fun on its own. I've learned how to get some really quick, nice orgasms with it. Perfect if I just need to relax a bit on my own. I've not tried it much with anyone else... Until today.

Today I spent the entire day with Arthur, my comet/lover. I've not seen him since this winter, so I was really looking forward to seeing him again. We played and fondled and fucked on his regrettably narrow bed, eventually putting the mattress on the floor. We made it work.

We keep exploring various D/s elements, without ever having a poper session. I struggle a lot with remaining passiv and staying in the moment, not over-analyzing or taking control. I feel guilty when I'm on the receiving end, like I'm not performing well enough to please him. I'm getting better (as he's getting better at directing my state of mind), but it's still really hard for me to relax.

Among other things, we used the wand together today. The first time I just gave myself an orgasm while he held me, which in itself is really intimate and nice. The second time, he held the wand. I directed him to the best angle, position and amount of pressure, but he held it. 

And somehow, that made a huge difference. First I struggled to relax enough to be able to come, but then suddenly my body just came without me having any conscious control over it. A full-body, loud orgasm. For a few seconds there I truly had no control over myself, my mind was just brought along for the ride. A super intense experience, which I hope we'll be able to replicate someday.

We also fucked twice today, and the last time was really intense. He was on top, holding me down and using his dick as a tool to tease me and control me. It left me gasping and grinning like crazy. The best thing, for me, was when he held me down by my throat while fucking me. So hot!

He's growing increasingly confident in applying force and even some pain. Today he bit and licked my neck for example (giving me a hicky, haha), and he's really manhandled my nipples. Next time maybe we'll try some nipples clamps. I've never enjoyed such things with anyone else, but wouldn't be surprised if he managed to "convert" me. He really has a thing for boobs.

I don't know when I'll see him again. We're taking about doing another hotel weekend in October, but I don't know yet if that will work out. What I do know is that I really love the time I spend with Arthur, and I'm looking forward to next time.