Lack of representation

I'm starting to notice the lack of representation. And it bothers me more than I was prepared for.

Basically, while living as a woman (remember: I thought I was cis until I was 35), I was used to society glorifying the female form. You know, the "male gaze". Sexy women are everywhere, like statues, commercials, on tv etc. My relationship to my own body was basically: "I enjoy people finding me attractive", but I didn't love myself at all. 

As I grow more masculine, I loose this representation. I don't see people who look anything like me, being seen as hot. As desirable. As beautiful. Nor do I hear it much. We don't compliment men or man-adjacent people, the same way we do women. Especially not "dad bod" types like me. 

And so I start to question my own desirability... Not because I regret transitioning (I don't!), but because I've lost that representation that I used to take for granted... I always hated my body, but at least I knew some people would find me sexy. Now I don't hate my body as much. On the contrary, I occasionally see things I think is sexy about myself.. Yet I don't feel desirable, because I've lost that representation and attention that I was used to. 

I might like myself better, but does anyone else? Can anyone look at me and find me sexy? Beautiful? Desirable? Get turned on by my appearance?

Liking myself more isn't enough. I would like others to desire me too.